Tuesday, September 2
Don't Blink or You'll Miss 'Em
By Alyssa Roenigk
EXPN.com
EXPN.com
Grind, Warner Brothers, PG-13, Directed by Casey La Scala
Grind is playing now, at a theatre near you. Or, in our case, at 11:20 a.m. at the only theater showing it in New York City. Lucky for us, it wasn't sold out.
We bought our overpriced tickets, found two seats (together — can you believe it?) and settled in for an hour and a half of cheesy jokes and bathroom humor.
We figured the movie couldn't be as bad as the reviews said. But as the opening scene drew to a close, we realized it just might be.
But, wait. Was that Mike Vallely mute grabbing over the box in the opening skate park scene? Is that Willie Santos? Kareem Campbell? Is that Shooter McGavin from Happy Gilmore as the main character's dad?
OK. This might be worth sticking around for. If the story doesn't keep us here, the search for cameos may. We counted appearances by 13 pro skateboarders and 11 actors — make that 11 we could name. Not bad for 90 minutes' work.
Some of our favorites:
Brian Posehn (Kevin the mailroom guy on Just Shoot Me) as an irate customer at Chili 'n' Such, a fast-food franchise where character Dustin Knight works as a counter boy.
Stephen Root (the Swingline Stapler guy from Office Space) as the manager of Chili 'n' Such, who is called on to pacify Brian Posehn's character.
Dave Foley (Kids in the Hall) as skateboard star Jimmy Wilson's tour manager who shuts down main character Eric Rivers and his friends, telling them, "Stay true to yourself and stay in the game. If you're good, you'll get noticed."
Donald Gibb (Ogre in Revenge of the Nerds) as Jimmy's bodyguard, wins the most-obscure-actor-cameo award for this role.
Christopher McDonald (Shooter McGavin in Happy Gilmore) as Eric's father, mid- mid life crisis
Bobcat Goldthwait as a sleezy motel clerk who lets the foursome clean and skate his pool and share the honeymoon suite. He's dressed in a heavy metal baby-tee and way-too-low-rise daisy dukes, looks old and bald, speaks in a "regular" voice, "skates" a La-Z Boy and is on screen under two minutes.
Poison makes an appearance via "Nothin but a Good Time" on the CD player in the required four-guys-singing-in-a-van-on-a-road-trip scene.
Tom Green as shop owner / DJ at Animal Chin's (a cameo by name only, not Chin himself) Skateshop in the backwoods of Colorado. He's wearing a Gator T-shirt, is covered in tats and jewelry and makes some of the best skateboarding sound effects ever to grace the big screen.
Preston Lacy of Jackass fame makes an appearance running to the port-o-john.
Randy Quaid (National Lampoon's Vacation series) as Matt, the clown of the group's, dad. In the most cliché of all the cameos, his character is, along with his wife and daughter, a circus clown.
Chad Fernandez offers the surprise comic relief of the film. Along with his blingin' Wiggaz skate team, he plays arch rival to Eric Rivers and faces off against him on the vert ramp in the final scene. (Actually, Brian Patch doubles for Fernandez.)
Bam Margera has the first speaking role by a pro skateboarder playing himself. "I'm all out. Do you want another drink?"
Brian Sumner was spotted sucking face on the couch at the exclusive VIP skaters-only party. We hope that was his wife under there.
Ryan Sheckler, with braces and short hair, has the next lines. At the Animal Chin Skateshop demo, he challenges the main character to a skate-off, curses and wants to leave and hit the strip clubs - yeah, 13 years old!
Bucky Lasek has the only other lines, as he walks onto Jimmy Wilson's tour bus. The two tour together throughout the movie.
We also spotted ...
Chris Gentry
Willie Santos
Mike Vallely
Kareem Campbell
Brian Patch
Bob Burnquist
Neal Hendrix
Paul Rodriguez Jr.
Jason "Wee Man" Acuna
Ehren "Danger" McGhehey
For movie times and locations, check out www.grindmovie.com.
Grind is playing now, at a theatre near you. Or, in our case, at 11:20 a.m. at the only theater showing it in New York City. Lucky for us, it wasn't sold out.
We bought our overpriced tickets, found two seats (together — can you believe it?) and settled in for an hour and a half of cheesy jokes and bathroom humor.
We figured the movie couldn't be as bad as the reviews said. But as the opening scene drew to a close, we realized it just might be.
But, wait. Was that Mike Vallely mute grabbing over the box in the opening skate park scene? Is that Willie Santos? Kareem Campbell? Is that Shooter McGavin from Happy Gilmore as the main character's dad?
OK. This might be worth sticking around for. If the story doesn't keep us here, the search for cameos may. We counted appearances by 13 pro skateboarders and 11 actors — make that 11 we could name. Not bad for 90 minutes' work.
 |
We also spotted ...
Chris Gentry
Willie Santos
Mike Vallely
Kareem Campbell
Brian Patch
Bob Burnquist
Neal Hendrix
Paul Rodriguez Jr.
Jason "Wee Man" Acuna
Ehren "Danger" McGhehey
For movie times and locations, check out www.grindmovie.com.
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